Monday, August 28, 2006 Kid Quotes Quickie: Oliver and I went to Vons the other day. As we were parking he noticed the man in the car next to us wearing a turban. He asked me what that funny hat was and I tried to explain as best I could. "It's a part of their culture to wear those turbans." Oliver sits there for a second, then starts pointing out the window, "Oh! I see another man with THE CULTURE!"

Crying... over you Current mood: content Awww, my little Charlie Girl and I had a bonding moment this evening. We were sitting there watching Toy Story 2 at my mom's house and there is a part where Jessie the Cowgirl is thinking about the girl who she used to belong to. It's a very touching part of the movie, with a lovely Sarah MacLaughlinloogermacdiddysumpin song. (I can't spell her name) My mom walks in and notices Charlie is ready to cry and tells her she has a good heart, and not to cry over the movie. I waited till my mom was gone, leaned over and told Charlie she could cry if she wanted to. That part of the movie always makes me cry too. So we sat there and sniffled together.

Funny Foreigners Current mood: bouncy Ok, if you haven't ever heard of engrish.com, you have to go check it out. Go ahead. I'll wait for ya. Now, click the Adult Engrish link and enjoy. I about peed my pants laughing at this stuff tonight when I found it.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

What's in a name Current mood: bored 1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet and current street name) Pepper Wible 2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your dad's side, your favorite candy) Beatrice Promises 3. YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME: (first initial of first name, first two or three letters of your middle name) K Bat 4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal) Pink Hedgehog 5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle or AKA name, city where you were born) Rianna Bakersfield 6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 2 letters of mom's maiden name and first 3 letters of the town you grew up in.) Bat Ka An Bak 7. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favorite color, favorite drink) The Pink Buttery Nipple 8. NASCAR NAME: (the first name of both your grandfathers) George Eugene 9. FUTURISTIC NAME: (the name of your favorite perfume/cologne and the name of your favorite shoe) Cool Water Converse 10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother/father's middle name and the next word you hear on the tv/radio/talk) Lyvonne But

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Kid Quotes: Star Trek Edition Current mood: amused The kids were looking out the window at some birds. Charlie: Ooh look at that big bird! Oliver: It's a vulcan. Charlie: Is it looking for babies? Oliver: Babies? No. Vulcans eat bird seed. And worms. Charlie: I think them eat babies.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

It's a Two Blog Night folks My baby started school this week. Oliver is a certified Kindergartener. He wasn't very excited about going the first day. He was curious, but didn't really show much enthusiasm. I took him over to the school and took him to his classroom. They handed him a necklace with his name on it and then kind of swooped him away into the room before I could even say goodbye. He didn't seem to mind. Me... I went back to the car and cried. I wasn't sad or anything. It's just hard to turn your little person over to someone you don't know. To put not only their body in the care of a stranger, but their little mind, feelings, ideas... everything. This child and his sister have been the main purpose of my life for over 4 years now. They are my reason for getting up in the morning. They force me to develop good habits, to try to be a better, saner, healthier person because I want to be a good role model for them. And to have my little love just swept away like that was like cutting the cord all over again. The first time it was to separate him from my body. This time it was to separate him from a world where I was the guiding light. I know, I know. He's got to have a life of his own to learn to be an independent person and all. I'm just saying they should have at least let me hug him up for a second and kiss my baby goodbye before I let him go to turn into a big boy. So we're three days into his first week and he is loving it. The first day I went to pick him up, he was near tears. He didn't want to go home. He even said he was going to hide in the bathroom so he didn't have to leave. The second day was "great" and today he "had so much fun and got to do all kinds of cool stuff." I am glad he's enjoying it so much, but it's still hard to walk away in the morning if he isn't in the classroom yet. I just have to trust they'll take as good of care of him as I would. I suppose I'll get over it in time. I'm a mommy. No doubt about it.

Kid Quotes Oliver: (looking at a bug, then jumping up and running away) EEEW! It's another of those stinky perfume bugs! The kids were all playing over at Grandma's in the back yard when my 12 yr. old nephew JR started telling them to run for their lives because a monster was coming. Charlie starts running like mad and screaming, "Run from your life! Run from your life!" Charlie: (drawing a picture) Momma this is you. I made your nose a little funky. And you have one of these... (drawing a squiggly line under my nose) Me: What's that? Charlie: It's a muskrat! 7 came up for the weekend and some of his laundry fell out of his bag and was laying in the car. Charlie: What are Dadddy's underwear doing in here? Kayla: I don't know. Charlie: I think him be wanting to take a sleepover at Grandma's house! Oliver: Mom, you're in the kitchen and I'm in the dining room. Kayla: You're right. Charlie: I wonder what room I'm in? Oliver: You're in the dining room. Charlie: (in a very snooty British accent) OOh... I'm in the DINING room. Oliver: (trying to get dressed and having a little trouble) Mom, can you help me get my pant sleeves untangled? Charlie: (singing the ending to the Alphabet song) Next time you won't sing with me!

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

My never ending day Current mood: tired Oy, today was a long one! I didn't get much sleep last night after my lil' bender. I kept waking up and I could swear I was hearing weird noises like something chewing inside the wall, my water bottle crunching up, and then I thought a giant spider was lowering itself towards my face. It was a bad night, followed by a tired and tiring day. I got up early to do the watering. At ten, I went to my WIC appointment for a "class" about why kids need to drink water in the summer. Basically they handed us to copied pages of clip art that told us you need to drink water and how bad everything else is for you. I felt that my time was well utilized. Then I went over to Ranch Market. I signed up for eDiets the other day and had to get my food to start that. The shopping list was like a mile long and it took me forever to find only part of what I needed. I went home, unloaded and headed over to FoodsCo to find the rest. I spent another two hours wandering around in there trying to find the remainder of the items. I was still missing two or three when I finally gave up and went to my mom's house. I was supposed to go there and she was going to take me home and drop me off, so she could have her van back. She decided to let me take it home, so i did. I went home, spent another hour or so cleaning out my fridge and putting away the massive amounts of food I had bought. As I was finishing up, Perla knocks on my door. The vacant apartment was ready for cleaning. So I gathered up my junk and went to clean that. Perla told me her brother was wanting to move into it tonight! That put me in a bit of a panic, since I knew it was going to take a whole lot of work to get it clean in there. In all, it took me like 7.5 hours to get it done. I didn't even get the outdsides of the windows done. I don't know if I'm gonna bother to go back and do them. During my cleaning time, 7 calls to say he needs to know about the Roadside assistance program we have since he locked himself out of the car. I told him we didn't have one. Luckily for him, he figured out how to start our Sam's Club roadside assistance program and they came and took care of him. So, now I'm home. I'm tired and dirty. I don't wanna go to bed by myself again. I'm worried I'm going to keep hearing weird sounds and freak out. My brother wouldn't even walk me home when I asked him too. I wanted him to have a look-see upstairs to make sure everything was cool and absent of murdering freaks. Weenie. Left me to fend for myself. If you don't hear from me anymore, you know the boogie man got me.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Dimmit Current mood: still drunk!! OK, that was supposed to say go to Big Lots.... not bog lots. heeheeheeheeheheehehehehehe SHoot, I wish someone were here to goof off with!!!!

Partay on Monday night Current mood: drunk SO I'm home alone and drunk off my ass on a monday night. Hubby is living in the OC, kids are at my mom's for the night. I was gonna have a little drink and go to bed. I accidentally had a lot of drink and got a lot drunk and am chatting with people all over the country and now blogging. I am drunk off my ass. I am scared to go close the laundry room for fear I'll fall down in front of the residents. I haven't been this drunk in forever!! Shit, everyone run over to Bog Lots and get you some of that bucket o' drink mix for $4.50. It's awesome. The end, before I embarrass myself.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Kid Quotes Current mood: sleepy Walking with Oliver last night . O: Eww, I just stepped on some cigarette guts. Playing with some little animal toys. Charlie: Oh Ollie, you just found my little stunk! Oliver decided to bring his Woody the Cowboy doll into the grocery store, where Woody proceeded to get into all kinds of trouble. Oliver: (VERY LOUDLY) Momma, my Woody is poking you in the butt! (Smattering of other adults giggling) Charlie: (very upset) Eddie's making a big big huge giant mess! A Godzilla one! (stretching her arms out as big as she can)This Big! Charlie: (thoughfully) Can Godzilla have some big shoes? Charlie: Can we sing Little Goldie Old Fish?

ust call me Mom
Current mood: okay So, not only am I old now, I am turning into a total suburban mom. I went to Sam's Club today and got a membership. I was commenting the other day about how I needed a minivan. And I got new flippy little hairdo last week at the mall. HELP ME!!

I've never been cool, hip or happening. I've always just been me. Usually a me that didn't have any clue who I was... well come to think of it, I still don't. Not completely anyway.

I have decided I am a good mom and a great wife and friend. I have a good work ethic and am honest. I try to do my small part to preserve our environment and help make this world a better place. Good grammar, good manners, cleanliness, accepting and welcoming responsibility and being nice are very important to me.

My children are my favorite thing in the world. I adore getting to be silly and goofy with them. Second favorite would have to be music that makes me happy and fills me with that feeling like I am a ballon reaching its bursting point. My husband falls in there somewhere too, but he's in a completely seperate and special category. (Short bus special... heehee. Just kidding.)

Money is very important. They say it can't buy you love or happiness, but love and happiness are much easier to maintain with a nice soft cushion of cash to pad the rough spots. Now I just have to figure out how to get my hands on some of it. I have a good feeling though about our current situation. I think we are entering a period of good things. The current of good karma should be just about ready to flow my way again, considering all the warm fuzzies and such I have been providing others here this past year. Hmm, did I just say karma owed me? Geez, hope that doesn't screw it up.

I suppose I should retitle this one "Rant about domestication and Random Declaration of Things". I never really know how these things are going to turn out. I will start trying to write, ususally on some topic as I find that easier, and get totally turned around to something else. My mind works in weird loop-de-loops and it can be seen in my writing, hence the nickname Random Girl. I clean house the same way. I'll start in the kitchen washing dishes, step on a toy and pick it up to go throw it on the stairs. As I am walking I'll notice an empty water bottle, put the toy down, pick up the bottle and go to the back yard to put it in the recycling bin and end up cleaning my patio. Then the kids will ask for food, so I go back in the kitchen, but realize my shirt has dirt on it, and not wanting to get dirt in the food, will head for the stairs to go change. I'll spy the toy I put down earlier, take it to the kids' room, notice it's a mess and begin cleaning. The kids will remind me they wanted food, so I'll go back to the kitchen, stopping to put in a load of laundry gathered from their room on my way there, remember my shirt is dirty, throw it in the wash and proceed to the kitchen. That's when I remember I was washing the dishes hours ago so I could make them lunch.

Blah blah blah... witty ending. I'm here till Thursday. Try the veal!

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Kid Quotes Current mood: busy During a discussion about birds. Charlie: I like mopping birds. Crows have big smiles and eat dirt. Oliver: Birds poop out guts when they fly around. Kayla: They do not! It's just poop. Oliver: (In a very stern and patronizing voice) No Mom, it's guts. Kayla: (Trying to go out to water the lawn) Come on guys, let's get ready to go! Oliver: To LA? Oliver: (suddenly jumping up from in front of the tv) Oh darn it! I'm always late. Kayla: Late for what? Oliver: Late for the bad guys. I'm supposed to go get Dr. Octopus. (racing up the stairs) On the phone with Daddy. Charlie: Hi Daddy. Oliver: Tell him you have a cow on your eyeball. Charlie: I love you. Oliver: Tell him you have a COW on your EYEBALL! Charlie: (Taking phone from her ear and covering the mouthpiece) Ollie, hush up! I talking a Daddy!

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

The Truth About Diets Current mood: chipper And for those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all the conflicting medical studies: 1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 4. The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausage and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

I'm back
Current mood: calm

Woo Hoo!! I have a working computer in the house again. I am so so so happy. I felt like I was suddenly on a deserted island.

No computer, no car, no hubby, and there you are.

It's been a lonely week around here for me. 7 moved down to Anaheim to start the new job last weekend and is so far loving it. I've been really busy cleaning and organizing.
Basically, all this is really doing is getting us ready to move again. I won't have to do a giant clean up on top of packing all our shit. I have no clue when we will be going, or actually if we will, but it's looking very much like we will. All this working has kind of kept my mind off the fact that he isn't here. It's just in the quiet times at the end of the day when I am downstairs trying to avoid getting into my empty bed that I really think about it.
We lived apart for a few months shortly after Charlie was born due to his job as well and I really don't want to ever go through that again. I'm trying to make this a very short seperation. I will hate to go to LA though since I finally have some friends of my own and am close to my parents and my brother's family here in Bakersfield. If I could just get them all to move with us, I'd be happy.

Iggy Pop

I was watching my daughter run around in her panties this morning when I realized she looks like Iggy Pop. She's long limbed and lean, with very visible muscles and her hair is always hanging in her face. She's just missing the bulging veins and self-inflicted wounds. Weird thought.

I look like... (Deluxe Edition)
Current mood: chipper

Wow, a bulletin has made me want to post really silly stuff in here. You put "(your name) looks like" in a Google search and see what it comes up with. Here are mine.

"kayla" looks like a total white. (Yeah, what of it?)

Kayla looks like she could give birth any time now. (Geez, I know I've put on some weight, but man, that's harsh)

KAYLA LOOKS LIKE SHE IS WORKING HARD HERE! (Workin hard, or hardly workin?)

Kayla- looks like she would be annerexic but she is always hangin with melanie (Bitch feeds me all the time, no wonder I look pregnant)

kayla looks like she is havin so much fun! oh and those eyes...those blueberry eyes!!! ... (What have you been smokin?)

(Kayla) looks like mostly like a Shepherd, (I do? I always thought Saint Bernard was more like it.)

KAYLA: Looks like a full house tonight, Ma. (Always a full house at my mom's)

Kayla looks like one of those Russian babes who is very close to perfection. She's not perfect though, she's really just a fucking dirty slut! ... (Shhh.. don't tell anyone)

Kayla looks like such a sweetheart Dee. (Who is Dee, and why are you talking about me to her?)

Kayla's looks like soft serve ice cream (It most certainly does not!!)

Kayla looks like a crackheadd. (If I smoked crack covered in bacon grease maybe)

you shall not know what kayla looks like. (Thanks Gandalf)

KAYLA LOOKS LIKE THE GIRL FRUM THE RING AND SHE HATES FAT PEOPLE. (I like fat people, really. The bigger the better. They make me look skinny.)

Kayla looks like a little sweetie and that picture of her and RubyDubie is so cute. (Rubie Dubie? Now I know what they were smokin.)

Kayla looks like she's never gotten over losing him..She's loved him all these years. (I never did get over it. Vince Gill, come back to me! Amy Grant is a weasel.)

Kayla, looks like the tree angel. (Picturing a pine with wings.)

Kayla looks like a real Sweetheart. (Bless your heart.)

I think Kayla looks like Parker Posey when she was in best of show, which really isnt a good think because she was one of the ones who needed therapy. ... (So I'm ugly and crazy?)

It Must Be A Cold Day In Hell Today

So you could call me amazed, flabbergasted and just plain dumbfounded. After weeks of my asking 7 to clean the lid of the trashcan, which he at some point in the distant past, splashed with chili/ketchup/oil/sacrificial blood, I walked into the kitchen to find a ..... wait for it...... mostly clean trashcan lid!!!! Wow! I feel like taking him upstairs and having my way with him right now! Way to go baby.

So I am going to try to bring over the blog entries I have been doing on my Myspace account to here. Bear with me if none of this makes sense.

Quickie Kid Quotes

While shopping in the underwear department at WalMart the other day, Charlie saw some padded bras hanging on a rack. "Look Daddy, little boobs. Little boobs for little babies."